''Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius, and it's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring'' Marilyn Monroe

Wednesday 20 April 2011

dreams of tomorrow and all the tomorrows after that...

I am currently away with my parents in a place that is miles from a city, and I am here partly to spend time with my parents and partly to be working on my final year essays and my dissertation. I am failing. I cannot concentrate on my work and I am going crazy at the lack of contact with my normal world. I have no signal and this morning my dad brought me some wireless internet so I could have access to some work I needed on the internet. 

Part of my avoidance of work and all things university related has involved me reading many a blog distracting myself from what I should and inevitably will be doing. 
I have been reading Rachel's blog encounterswithjoy; she is an amazing girl and her blog always makes me stop and think, and smile and laugh. 

I realised as I read through her past posts, that actually me sitting here wasting away my days is pointless. There are many a thing in my life that I should be thankful for. I have incredible parents and an ever patient big brother, who throughout their lives have supported me without fail. I have friends who I could call on in a second and they will listen and council and be there to laugh and joke through the hard things. I have been given the opportunity to study in ways that many in this world cannot (and therefore should embrace it and not ignore it) and I have been given so many opportunities to travel and experience the world. 
Most of all I have been given the joy of knowing God and His ever bounding love. I have been comforted and taught and challenged by my Father in heaven and I am able to rest in the knowledge that He is my king. 
I can rest in the fact that He loves me all the time, no matter what... 

In her blog Rachel wrote this:
"because the truth is that he likes me - and you - A LOT, he laughs at the things you laugh at, he understands when you're afraid angry or just plain bored. When you cry he cries - he loves the people you love even when they don't love him, he doesn't disapprove of you - he thinks you are utterly top notch!! When you do something that you're passionate about and are totally in your element he sees that too and rejoices in it - he created you to live a truly full life."

this is what i am thankful for, i am thankful that He understands that I am bored of my work and that it frustrates me, i am thankful that He knows the things that are occupying my brain and driving me crazy and He knows that i miss being in a city and seeing the business that fuels everyone. 

In a few months I will be graduating from University and starting out life outside of education- I am excited and slightly scared of the things that are to come, but I know that He has everything in His hands. 
I am excited to do things that I am passionate about and things that scare and push me. 
I am excited for what is going to happen and the places that I will be going, the new people that I am going to meet, the adventures I will be going on. 

I have dreams of tomorrow and the things that I can do, I have big ideas that form in my daydreams. But for now I am trying to focus on the work I have to do now.
 The place that I am in now and what that is and what God is showing me. 

so back to the slog of work, or maybe it won't be such a slog and maybe I might find joy in the work I have to do.

1 comment:

  1. Rachel love you are so beautiful and I feel honored by this, proud to be your sis in him x x x

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